Friday, April 18, 2008
OMG. There's a new book written by a plastic surgeon to help women who are having plastic surgery walk through the process with their toddlers and young children. My kids are 12, 8 and 6. They would notice if this mommy came home with a new nose or bigger breasts.
Let's be honest here. I have my moments of vanity. I'm a moisturizer junkie, who has also had to curb my appetite for nail polish. A few months after giving birth to my daughter, I had my eyeliner tattooed onto my eyelids. (Yes, it hurt...a lot. But childbirth hurt more...much more.) I have a thing for great haircuts and hair color, and the local beauty school has allowed for the occasional splurge - a facial for $15!
And I've thought about plastic surgery - breast augmentation to be specific. A boob job to be blunt. I wrote a little bit about my personal body image dilemma in "More Than Serving Tea" in the chapter on sexuality. I'm petite with an upper body that looks the same as I did in 6th grade. Finding tailored clothes, even a nice dress, becomes a hunt for the holy grail simply because those darts in the front are meant for some other woman.
I can laugh about it, but when I'm honest there are moments when I compare myself to the media's images of beauty. I walk away defeated and a bit confused. And I wonder what would it be like to go under the knife.
There are a few things that stop me.
1. Money - those who know me know that I would never pay for plastic surgery even if I could.
2. Pain - again, those who know me know I have a very high tolerance for pain. However, after watching Dr. 90210 one night and catching a glimpse of an actual breast augmentation I recognized my limits for pain.
3. Hypocrisy - one of my struggles is to love my neighbor as myself...I had a hard time loving myself and therefore loving others. So, I am a sinner saved by grace who is learning and longing to love her embodied self. Imagine the conversation I would have with my daughter or my neighbors - "God loves you and knew what He was doing when He created you, your mind, your heart, your body....oh, and by the way, I got a boob job because even though God loves me I wanted to improve on His plans."
Oversimplified? Yes. But I see my middle school-aged daughter begin to play around with hairstyles, decide what "looks good" in terms of clothing and lip gloss, take delight in her growth spurt that puts her about two inches shy of me. She's beautiful - all of her. And I listen to my two boys who could care less about lip gloss, except when I get it on them, but sit on my lap and lean into me to say, "Mommy, you're beautiful except when you yell."
But the sun is finally out, and pool season is just around the corner...
Would you ever go under the knife?